Finally. The topic of sex.

 First, I want to comment on Noelles blog. She states in high school she was picked on for not having sex. I completely understand how she must have felt. I had gone to an all-girls, catholic high school and sex was NOT talked about. If someone were to have sex, it was kept hush hush and it wasn’t something that was bragged about. Out of my group of friends, I was the one who was scared to have sex. Not just because of the initial “losing of my virginity” but also for the emotional consequences that come along with it. So therefore, I was picked on for being the “prude”. But, once I started dating this guy at the age of 18, my views changed and I was no longer scared. So Noelle, I know where you’re coming from!

In White’s blog, she mentions that having sex is good but so is NOT having sex. With the way society is today, if a person doesn’t have sex it’s more of a shocker. I had to kind of step back for a second and check myself. I have a friend who never has sex and I mean NEVER. And in the past, I have made comments to her about it and implied that it just wasn’t normal. Now I’m being who my group of friends were being in high school and putting pressure on someone I care about and value as a friend and I know she’s upset by it. Just because I personally love sex, doesn’t mean that everyone around me loves it equally as much. 

I also like how White states that intimacy is complex. She’s right, especially when it comes to females.  In most female’s minds, when you are intimate with someone, you’re giving that person a part of yourself. This in turn can cause attachment and emotional issues such as if the person you were intimate with breaks your heart. Guys on the other hand, can go out and bring someone different home every night and not have any attachment issues with women.  Not saying this is true for every guy, it’s just the common standard for males. 

Lastly, White states that “just because it doesn’t turn you on doesn’t mean it’s wrong”.  I read mikes blog and I like how he said not to “yuck someone’s yum”. People are turned on to different things, what I might like is different from what someone else might be into. Fetish’s are a big part of the sex world today and just because we might not understand some of them doesn’t mean they’re wrong.  I guess there really is no wrong when it comes to sex.

After reading Whites blog I can say I am sex positive. 

 Who knew sex had so many benefits?

Cinderella ate my daughter talking points

Disney princesses to this day still play a very big role in a little girls life. However, I disagree with the fact that they brainwash little girls and make them think they are a princess. When I was younger, I loved the Disney princesses and I would love to play dress up and pretend I was belle or Aurora. I never actually thought I was a princess nor did I think I deserved everything a princess had. I think the whole term "princess" comes from the phrase "daddys little princess" where a father will go above and beyond for his daughter buying her anything she wants. That also comes from a fathers enabling of his daughter into letting her think she deserves the world.. literally.

I have a 22 year old friend who works at the Disney store and buys anything involving a Disney princess. So, I asked her about how they influenced her life as a little girl and even now in her early twenties. This is what she said: "I mean, I understand why one would think a Disney princess influences a girl SO much with actually being a princess, but I think they are also portraying something deeper then just the 'outer shell' of looking and acting like a princess. All princesses have different traits, they have different obstacles to overcome, hopes, dreams and they each have their own demons. Maybe that is why someones daughter is pretending to be snow white, because their dreams or traits are the same. who knows. I just know I am who I am today because of my family. not because I thought I was a Disney princess."

Being a business major, I see nothing wrong with the selling of them either. And the whole color issue, who cares?  A color is a color. and society has a way of identifying them with certain things. If a boy wants to ride a pink bike so what? That doesn't make him "girly". I know I am who I am today because I had the freedom to choose my toys and what I wanted to play with. I played sports when I was young, but I still loved getting a barbie doll and dressing her up whenever I could. And I watched every Disney movie out there, but I knew a princess was a fantasy thing and I was in the real world.

"God hates you because.."

So I just read Noelle's blog about her friend who was asked "why is your skin so dirty" and it made me think of a time in elementary school when I first witnessed racism. I was in fifth grade and I had a black friend named Erin. One afternoon after recess, Erin was talking to a boy in the class named Tom who was white. All of a sudden I just remember Erin saying to Tom "well God hates you because you're mean!" and Toms response was "Yea? well God hates you because you're black". Being in fifth grade, this was the first time I experienced anything like this and I think I could speak for all of my former classmates when I say it was a jaw dropping moment. Erin ran out of the room crying and Tom was sent home for the day.

Even though we were young, we understood how hurt Erin was. Tom didn't say "God hates you because you're a female" but instead went right to her skin color. I thought this was an appropriate story to share since we have been talking about racism in class.

"What are little boys made of" Kimmel-Quotes.

Quotes:

“To hear some tell it, there is a virtual war against boys in America. Best sellers subtitles counsel us to ‘protect’ boys, to ‘rescue’ them. Inside, we hear how boys are failing in school, where their behavior is increasingly seen as a problem. Therapists advise anguished parents about boys fragility, their hidden despair and despondence. Boys, we read, are depressed, suicidal, emotionally shut down.”

-First I would like to touch on the “protect” and “rescue” aspect. What are we rescuing them from exactly? Feminism? Yes, because I’m sure a young boy knows all about feminism. I also don’t like how in this quote, the word “boys” is so broad. In the last sentence it says “boys, we read, are depressed, suicidal, emotionally shut down”. Is this sentence applying to EVERY boy? Or maybe perhaps just a small percentage of kids who happen to be male. Also, a boy’s behavior is different than girls because of biology and other factors as well. Maybe they have a behavior problem because of situations at home, problems at school, problems with friends, etc. This opening paragraph was a little bizarre to me and felt the need to argue against it.

"If all the boys are white and middle class, at least they're not all straight. Most therapists treat homosexuality casually, dropping in a brief reference, ‘explaining’ it as biological, and urging compassion and understanding before returning to more "important" stuff."

-          I read this quote first on Jessica’s blog, and then when reading the article it really stuck out to me. I don’t like how it’s just a “brief” topic. All too often, authors sweep homosexuality under the rug and don’t acknowledge it the way they should. In my first quote and in the beginning of the article it says how boys are depressed, suicidal, and emotionally shut down. The author doesn’t specify if this means gay or straight boys, since he uses the word so broadly, but I think this could potentially apply to gay males in the sense that many struggle with their sexual orientation. How often do we hear about bullying especially when it comes to gay people? Bullying leads to depression, being suicidal and emotionally shutting down. I think that is the small percentage of “boys” he was referring to in the beginning.

“The real boy crisis usually goes by another name. We call it “teen violence”, “youth violence”, “gang violence”, “violence in the schools”. Let’s face facts: men and boys are responsible for 85 percent of all violent crimes in this country, and their victims are overwhelmingly male as well. From an early age, boys learn that violence is not only an acceptable form of conflict resolution, but one that is admired.”

-         

This quote I do agree with. It is true that male’s respond quickly to violence and are exposed to it at such an early age. But whose fault is that? Society’s. There are so many movies and video games out there that target a young male audience so it’s not a surprise that boys are the more “violent” type.  I feel better that within this quote it has a percentage narrowed down instead of the general word use of “boys”. Lastly, I agree with the statement saying that violence is admired in boys. The tougher you are, the higher up on the pedestal you are in most cases.

It gets better..

I was watching MTV the other night and there is a series starting called "It gets better" and it follows three teens struggling with being a part of the LGBT community. It shows how they come out to their parents and follows them after they graduate high school. It's on tonight at 11 I believe and it looks really interesting. Just thought I'd let everyone know!

The Masters Tools will never dismantle the Masters House.

This reading was very eye opening in the sense that there are still battles among women, even the ones who all identify as feminists.

Lorde also looks at how society views people. In today's society, there is still racism that exists even if people fail to identify it. As if this isn't bothersome enough, obviously there are people out there who believe being gay is wrong and a psychological issue. Lorde touches upon what its like to be a black, lesbian woman and how to have technically two aspects working against her. I always kind of viewed women equal amongst ourselves because we are all still fighting the same battle;equality. I never really thought of the fact that white women are viewed on a higher scale than black women. The females who are straight, white and privileged are considered to be today's accepted circle of women. Lorde states "those of us who stand outside the circle of this society's definition of acceptable women; those of us who have been forged in the crucibles of difference-those of us who are poor,who are lesbians, who are black, who are older..." This paints a picture of the women who are on the outside looking in to the women who society accepts.

I think women, and feminist women, should come together and fight as a whole for women's rights instead of separating ourselves based on race or other factors. I think in the end that is what is important.

did that really just happen?

Literally just typed a whole blog about the article compulsory heterosexual and lesbian existence and somehow someway, I lost it. I would retype it all now but I'm so exhausted I'll just do it tomorrow. SO PISSED! ugh it has to be around SOMEWHEREE RIGHT!?